Our landlords contacted us last night to let us know that unfortunately, they would not be able to renew our lease, which is up at the end of July. For personal reasons, they want to move back to the condo, and well, they own it, and they're not breaking the lease or anything, so it's totally within their rights. And I understand why they want to move back. But I'm still sad about it.
Ok, let me cry for a minute. I feel like we've barely gotten settled here. I mean, we've hardly finished unpacking. Only a week ago, I finished mounting the final HDMI cable with wall clips so that it looks nice and neat. I've just started settling into routines, enjoying my morning walk, decorating and planting things on the patio. Just in the last few months, I've started to feel one hundred percent at home here, in this condo, in this neighborhood. I have ballet and pilates just up the street. I stop by Whole Foods on my way home from work, and I finally feel like I've reached the point where I feel...settled. The thought of uprooting and starting new, again, is daunting. And sad.
Honestly, there are two parts to this: the frustration of having to move again and the sadness of leaving a place that I genuinely love. Sure, it doesn't have the Craftsman charm or a gas stove or floods of natural light, but it had everything else on our list (and more). I've really come to love it here. I love that when it's cold out, Will can make a fire. And I love that our patio is large enough for a small couch, table, chairs, and delightful potted plants. I love the way our stuff fits. I know it's kind of silly, but as I sit here and look around, I really like the way our things fit. I love the linen closet and the coat closet and the storage closet across the hall. Of course, I'd love a bigger kitchen and dining room, but our things fit just fine. I knew that we would move eventually, but I really thought we had another year or two in this space. And it makes me sad to look around at what feels like home and realize that in less than two months, it won't be.
The frustration comes from the fact that I've been moving or thinking about moving for the last 12 months. We officially started looking for a new place last April/May (we had started casually looking in August), and found it in July. We were still unpacking in the fall, when I started working at Disqus. By December, I was starting to plan an office move at work. I'm still wrapping up the move at work, and now we have to start looking for apartments again. I mean, what?! That's three moves in 12 months. And don't they say that moving is one of the top stressors in modern life? I believe it. Thinking about moving again right now (or ok, in the next 7 weeks - SEVEN WEEKS OMG) is seriously worrisome. I'm afraid I'm going to develop that eye twitch again.
All that said, I know it will be ok. And I feel like a major idiot for crying about this while there are people out there who have lost their entire homes to tornadoes, floods, and the like. There are people who are losing their homes because the banks are screwing them. There are people losing their lives, their loved ones, and so so so very much more than I can imagine losing. I know that. I know it's just a condo. I know that we are lucky to be able to afford to move again; even though it wasn't quite in the budget, it's not going to break the bank. And I know that we will find something. I know that being sad, thinking that we might have to downgrade or give up some of the things we've been spoiled by over the last 10 months is well...sort of lame. But you know what? I'm still sad.
In typical Type A, Control Freak Kim fashion, I started looking for places as soon as I processed the contents of our landlords' email. I was in a little bit of a state of shock, and instantly, my fingers drifted to Craigslist (I wasn't thinking clearly, or obviously I would have gone directly to PadMapper). This morning, I opened up a PadMapper account so that Will and I can easily track our apartment interests, and I set up a bunch of email alerts for different geographic regions, based on where we looked a year ago. I will probably cry about this several more times over the next 7 weeks, but gosh darn it if I won't start taking action. It's what I do.
For now, I suppose the hunt is on. I'm glad that I didn't start my "frame and hang a bunch of pictures on the walls" project...or sell the washer/dryer (thanks for taking care of it, Jenny and Jeff). And hey, maybe we'll find a nice place with everything this place has and more! Who knows? Miracles can happen!
I'll do my best to keep the blog updated so you can all play along. And if you're looking for a little humor, here are some posts I wrote for Berkeleyside during last year's apartment hunt.
- Home Hunting in Berkeley: Lessons Learned
- Home Hunting in Berkeley: Lamenting the Listings
- Funny Business: Listing Scams and Malapropisms
- Message to Renters and Landlords: You Have Rights
Enjoy! And if you are the praying/well-wishing/sending-positive-vibes-out-into-the-universe type, please wish us luck (or whatever).
I'm sending positive vibes out into the universe for you. I'm right there with you on moving.ReplyDelete
I know you'll find another great place!
Thanks, Lyssa. Much appreciated.ReplyDelete
Hang in there, Weiseyberg! Moving totally sucks, but you will find a great place! Just think about all the re-decorating you will get to do. (that was supposed to be a positive!) Don't forget your painting buddies! Norah is ready to help now :-)ReplyDelete
I will pull in all the connections I have and send tons of positive thoughts!ReplyDelete
Well Kim, what a pain...I get it. Mike and I moved ourselves (and I mean BY OURSELVES) 9 times in 13 years! 3 times when I was pregnant with Casey - the last time was 2 weeks before he was born! I still can't figure out how he moved the sofa-bed and Hosier by himself! UGH. Or there was the fun move when Talia was 8 months old and it was getting dark...the furniture was on the front lawn...poor baby Tally was tired, but I had to help move the stuff, so I strapped her in her car seat - pushed up tight against the patio pillar...and moved stuff. There she sat screamin' her bloody head off!!!! Poor girl! lol But sometimes ya just gotta do it, eh!ReplyDelete
Does your crazy aunts humor help? Nah, I didn't really think it would!!! But I did have the thought that maybe all that moving is the reason I don't want to move nowadays!!! Ha!
Well girl, at least you're experienced! And remember...Home is Where Your Heart Is!
Hey there Cruickyshankeys. Thanks for the positive vibes. I suppose all theReplyDelete
decorating will stand in for the decorating we never really got done
here...you know, all the things that were on the decorating to-do list. :)
Maybe we'll have a painting party - I've been thinking it would be fun to
do some canvases...
Thanks mom :)ReplyDelete
Thanks, Nance. My crazy aunt's humor definitely helped. Always good to hearReplyDelete
another perspective! ;-) I don't know how you did it! xoxo
Place next to us is for sale, $549k. It's bigger than ours. And overpriced. Still, DO IT. ;)ReplyDelete
Ha ha, good one.ReplyDelete
oh, I hate, hate moving. I moved 5 times before I was in college and my family moved houses 3 times before I graduated college. And then I had to move twice here in Iowa. I hate it. There is nothing better than being settled somewhere. Good luck! Remember, housing is cheap in Iowa. For what you pay in rent you could buy the lovely house up the street from me...:) Just saying.ReplyDelete
Ugh, moving is such a pain for sure. That was one of the best feelings about moving into the house we bought last spring - nobody could make us move now! Then we realized it's a lot of work to pay a mortgage every month. :P There are always tradeoffs. :)ReplyDelete
Don't tempt me, Lenz...ReplyDelete
Indeed. We're not ready (financially OR lifestyle-wise) to buy property atReplyDelete
this point, but there are definitely things about it that are tempting. Like
not being forced to move.
Kim! Move into our complex! The place across the way is available!ReplyDelete
Too far from BART for two people who take it every day to work... :(ReplyDelete
You wouldn't be interested in renting a house next door from us in Alameda, would you? Its just a short bike ride to BART...ReplyDelete
How funny, you and Dana are both trying to get us to Alameda :)ReplyDelete
I think we want to stay closer to BART, like (safe) walking distance. But
Ben and I cut down the ugly cypress/red cedar (I can't tell the two apart) that was hogging half our backyard and suddenly the house feels like it's somewhat more mine. It's weird--I made a decision that cannot be undone in regard to my house. Does that make it mine? Painting a room--hell, I work in theatre. That means nothing. Planting tomatoes--they're annuals anyway. But a tree. It was about ten years old, ten feet tall and fairly sturdy, but it was leaning precariously and was being pushed over by a huge knotted jasmine vine behind it and it was just too big for the space it was trying to occupy. I got clearance from the homeowner to do it, but it was my decision. It feels strange.ReplyDelete
Now they'll probably come tearing back over here from Mexico to reclaim their house.
Hey, if they gave you clearance to do it, you had every right to do it! GoodReplyDelete
for you though - sounds very champion-like.